Going up?

Ok so I'm not a big fan of elevators. I'm kind of scared of getting trapped in one and it being small and confined and there being no way out. I have a kind of phobia of being trapped...ok, a deifnate phobia. Well today was kind of like the elevator world threw all it's best stuff at me...

Firstly there was 'the pacer'. These are people who pace up and down the elevator while it moves. They seem nervous which in turn makes me feel more nervous. Why are they pacing in the first place...it doesn't make it go any faster and it's a small space so where are they pacing to? They only have about a metre and a half to walk up and down. I think it's kind of rude too because they don't really leave any room for anyone else so you're stuck in a corner in an already small space not knowing if the elevator will make it to your floor where you can get out and find air...sweet lovely open spaced air.

Secondly there was the fire retardent blankets. These coverings just serve to make the elevator seem smaller and they cover the buttons so you need to push them out of the way to find the buttons and then hold them back while all the other people press them too. To add to this whole situation someone in our building ever so nicely writes 'good' on them (apart from one where someone mispelled it and wrote 'God'). I mean what happens if you get in and one says 'bad' it's not like you can escape anywhere. You're just a person stuck in a small space with a defective blanket. Why do they feel the need to inform us as to whether they're good or bad...I'd rather live in blissful ignorance.

Thirdly there was the emergency phone. So I get into the elevator (bearing in mind I had already experienced 1 and 2) and the box is open for the emergency phone. This starts sending off alarm bells in my head. Why is this open??? Did someone have to use it??? Am I going to end up stuck in an elevator on my own and use this push button thingy ma doofer??? I'm not a big fan of phones either if I don't know the person....which is weird...a large part of my job is to answer the phone and make calls. I always trip over my words and sound like an idiot...I do that in elevators too. I need to pay more attention to the floors and the up and down arrows.

I just don't like elevators. Why can't we use stairs. It would help combat some of the weight problems that currently exist if we made everyone take the stairs instead of locking them and only using them for fires. I mean what's the point in that! Meh stupid elevators....please work.